30.Jul.14 1 day ago
  • Me: *out for dinner with my dad because we were too lazy to cook*
  • Random Old Lady: *comes up out of no where with the most judgmental look ever* (will also be refereed to as 'ROL')
  • ROL: Isn't he a little old for you?
  • Me: Well, considering he's my Dad, I'd say that your a judgmental hag.
  • Dad: *chokes into his drink*
  • ROL: You should respect your elders.
  • Me: You should respect your youth, we're the ones who'll decide on whether or not to pull your cord in like, what? Five weeks?
  • Dad: *chokes on his drink again*
  • ROL: *storms off*
  • Dad: *looks at me with a disapproving look*
  • Me: What?
  • Dad: Come on, you and I both know it will be three weeks.
29.Jul.14 1 day ago

the-sexylosers-club:

mcpeace323:

Stretch marks? 

You mean sick ass lightning tattoos 

Best description I’ve ever heard

(via killjoy-of-awkward-unicorns)

29.Jul.14 1 day ago

condorn:

yeah ur secrets safe with me
I wasn’t listening in the first place

(Source: condom, via poetic)

29.Jul.14 1 day ago

deadlyspoons:

I either dress like im going to a red carpet event or like im a homeless drug addict there is no in between

(Source: whitedad, via greed)

29.Jul.14 2 days ago